Life's Uncertainties!!

Although our intellect always longs for clarity and certainty, our nature often finds uncertainty fascinating...

I had such an incident happen to me last night, and I had to share

my fascination about what happened with the world

Friday evening in Pune, and I was looking to celebrate the end of the working week with a nice and quiet dinner... I asked this wonderful girl I know out to dinner.. it was completely out of the blue.. and i was not really sure if she would agree to come for dinner, as it was such short notice.... Thankfully, she agreed, and this was just the beginning of one of the most memorable nights of my life...

So, I pick her up, and we are still undecided about where we want to go.. she suggested Tertuliya in Koregaon Park a place we both knew was cozy and warm, with a wonderful spread of food and drink.. We sit down and have a few drinks, with some light conversation, where she brings up her fascination with the sea and how much she loves Marine Drive in Bombay (Bombay.. Mumbai... I don't give a rat's ass) i didn't know what I was thinking, but i offered to drive there and spend some time by the sea... At first she didn't react... she probably thought I was joking.. but then, we decided to leave and so see Marine Drive in all its glory on a rainy night in Monsoon...

We set off from Pune at approximately 11 pm... the drive to Mumbai was a 3 hour one.. and along the way there was a lot of catching up we did.. we were in school and junior college together... and we spent most of the journey recounting the things we did.. stupid and otherwise... She had a good time pulling my leg on the one major mistake I made in college... and I am sure even to the day we shall both be 80 year old retirees, she shall remind me of the colossal mistake :) After a while we were recounting the time I had asked her out during the school re-union publicly in front of a crowd of 200 people we studied with and how that incident had caused quite a flutter.. and the two of us were oblivious to all the gossip that was doing the rounds.. even though she turned me down then, we continue to be good friends and we share a wonderful Utopian relationship to this date and that is the beauty of knowing her.. She knows what to take seriously and what to just let go of... During the discussion, we played some music and began to sing-along... humming old Hindi classics, driving in the rain through the clouds.. We kept to the songs and it was fun doing that with someone you know ( Talk about the probability of that one)

Soon enough, we had entered maximum city, and along the way, i noticed her fascination with tall buildings and upon my asking, she revealed that she found them to be symbols of strength. As we got onto JJ flyover, i could sense her excitement of being close to the sea... Soon enough, we were at Marine Drive, parked by the promenade and seated on the parapet with a wonderful view of the sea and city lights... This at 2 am on a Friday night, and there were a lot of people around, but I had eyes only for her... The smile on her face mesmerized me as I could make out, it was one of sheer joy and satisfaction... the wind blew her hair around, but she didn't care.. all she was doing was soaking up the moment and that showed on her face.. I always wanted to be able to feel that way, but I guess I am just not able to bring myself to be that expressive. The lateness of the hour forgotten, her smile had completely refreshed me.. and that is a feeling I will always cherish....

We started driving back to Pune around 2:30... she was really tired and fell asleep in the car... while I had my eyes on the road... sneaking a few glances to see her sleep... there was a different kind of peace that was visible.. probably the kind you get when you achieve enlightenment.... but my eyes were getting heavy... So I made a quick stop to grab a cup of coffee... She happened to awaken around that time, so we shared a cuppa on the e-way.. I guess coffee woke her up good... and we were back to enjoying oldies and singing along to them...

We got back to her place at around 5:30 am, and we watched the sun rise together from her balcony... It was the perfect end to the wonderful time we had together... and I really really look forward to doing this again with her sometime soon...

Here is a picture of the wonderful smile that is so ingrained in my memory!!

As for me.... For my part I know nothing with any certainty, but the sight of stars makes me dream.

The fastest way to break the cycle of perfectionism and become fearless is to give up the idea of doing it perfectly - to embrace uncertainty and imperfection.

Until next time

Cheers!!!